Wednesday, 17 January 2018

Yesh

Booked my mum and aunts a spa trip with my usual favorite place at Holiday Inn over the CNY period....

This time its 3d2n apart from the usual 2d1n so lets see if my mum can handle doing nothing in Batam.  I did arrange for shuttle to Nagoya to shop / eat so maybe its not that bad?

Accomodation check
Ferry check
Shuttle to/fro ferry check
Shuttle to/fro Nagoya check
Spa booking check

Everything is settle just pending departure..

Can't wait...

Wednesday, 10 January 2018

First for everything

6.20am woke up before daylight and alarm and I couldn't get back to bed.

So I woke up instead of trying to get back to sleep.

I went to bed last night at about 12mn with an unsure mind after being told at work that due to the sale of the assets in company, there wasn't much work left.

Situation in office is staff > work so I was one of the staff to go at Feb. end as instructed by the biggest boss.

Actually 1 of the staff or the only staff, these I wouldn't know and I never ask because I know HR will not say at all.

Given that I saw senior accountant, accountant and accountant assistant being called into the room together, those 3 are confirmed staying.  HR needless to say, she's staying coz she handles nearly all administrative things.

I'm not sure of the other accountant and dispatch uncle thou.

I mean, they would still need delivery of documents/cheques into Malaysia etc and even thou the volume is really little these days but I don't think they would let the dispatch go.

What's the point of deducing anyway?

None.

When I was told.  I actually felt relieved.

As those who read this blog will know I have been complaining about the situation in office and wanted to resign but I didn't know how to broach the subject.  I was complacent and in my comfort zone with the work that also resulted me in staying on for soo long at work. Longer than the other assistants before me. 3 in fact.

I am an honest person and I actually told my boss and HR in the room I actually had thoughts of resigning already. They asked if I found a new job but I told them no, I haven't thought about it that far. I wanted to take a break from work for awhile before looking.  Told them about the online shop and to see how it goes before deciding.

Boss mentioned she actually recommended me to another listed company with good benefits and better boss. Work would be fast paced and stress.  Then work punctuality would be needed and I can't bring my own things to work to do. {hinting about my cross stitch}

I declined the offer without a doubt.

Not because of the punctuality and doing my own things but because of the fast paced and stress environment.  I needed away from accounts because that's what's stressing me out.  The deadlines, the numbers.

If in a small company I am already like that, what more a larger, a more busier company.  No doubt the benefits and bonuses are better?  I am not capable enough to earn that much.

Boss and HR tried to convince to go for the interview to see how the job scope is and what not.  They seemed genuine in the offer as they think I am efficient in my work and I would be able to do well there.

But my inner voice says no.

No idea the no is because I didn't want a stress environment or I knew some how I have it all sorted out and something better is coming?

One thing I felt discouraged is that my HR is against my interest in going towards craft direction and mentioned that there has to be balance between passion and survival.  In Singapore, its hard to survive on arts alone.

Come on, you actually think I don't know that?  If I don't, I wouldn't have stayed with this company for almost 7 yrs.

I joined in 17.06.11.  It was my first job after graduation and the only company that called me up of interview.  I really enjoyed going to work.  I was what I think dedicated worker?  If you want me to stay back, I will.  I don't complained about the pay (which my other colleague demanded and got turned down, she subsequently quit because she couldn't handle the stress and having to breastfeed her newborn. HA, you should have seen the situation in office. I feel for her than the boss).  If I am late for work, I will payback by staying late provided someone else also stayed because I didn't have the key to the office. If work comes, I make sure I do it at once because I can never drop it at a whim and go out for lunch and come back later.

Its just not my character as a Taurus.

But over the years the environment changed to quite stifling.

I got sick of having to always look out for deadlines.  Rush courier, rush cheques.  Most of the time, the reasons are not about me anyway but I have to be responsible to look out, to watch out.  It affected my mood a lot and needless to say, I couldn't take leave as and when I want because I feel it was my responsibility to make sure things are done before I can feel at ease.

I AM NOT ANGRY WITH THE COMPANY'S DECISION.

I really am not.

The conscious in me understand the situation.  I myself feel odd being paid to do the volume of work i'm doing and I somehow seemed it coming.  Just that it happened a little sooner than I thought.  Right after closing and before the Chinese New Year.

Oh about the job interview, I woke up with the same thought. No.

I'm not going for it.

My inner voice never fails me and I hope this round it doesn't as well.

Its 7.20am now. Got to get ready for work soon.

P.s I wonder about the 17days of leave I have in 2017 which I have not cleared.  If I were to take the leave I may just leave office end Jan.

Thursday, 21 December 2017

random

Its been 2 mths since i last posted... many things happened...

1) 2 celebrities in Korean entertainment passed away.

An actor whom I love due to tragic accident in Oct.
A singer whom I knew due to suicide from depression just a couple of days ago.

Both sudden and really unexpected passings....

2) Etsy shop has been rather silent in Dec after 5 sales in Nov which is the highest ever.  It doesn't matter thou.

3) Still at the same job but today is hard.


*AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH~*